Maybe its a monday thing, but I kind of got the vibes for a poem on Mondays. Maybe every monday shall be poem day.


Let Go


There comes a time, when meetings part,
When friends leave, or lovers break hearts.
"Nothing is forever", or so they said,
Run away, and all shall be allayed.

What's done was done, what's passed, past.
All left now, are dreams crumbled dust.
Savour nothing, for its all gone,
Wipe the tears, and let new love be reborn.

==============================================================
Currently in a tuition class at orchard on sundays, and I just have to bitch about this.


I guess every class is composed of this few types of people:

The "Cool" aka big clique of people who dominate the class: these are those who are regulars and usually aren't shy about making alot of noise and asking questions. They are not so bad.

The Nerd aka weird and irritating idiot who sits in front and bombards the teacher with alot of questions: ya, basically its that. And he must have a bad fashion sense, loves arguing and has alot of weird actions, i.e. punchingthe air when answering a question correct while doing own work, or bringing other school work to do during tution. This is bad.

The Act Cool aka has some friends and has weird fashion sense while looking weird: This I have nothing to say... just plain plain irritating at times.

The Deaf aka the one who talks to others too much to listen: Another question bombarder, but with stupid questions that has already been answer by the teacher. Ultra-irritating.

The Pretty Girl aka eye candy: Pretty girl to keep you entertained during tution. Good motivation to go tuition. The centre I go to has erh.. 3 I think. And one's from VJ. Vj still go tuition. Tsk. Sometimes wear un-tuition like clothes, i.e. very glam. But well, it is in town, and girls love dressing up. Not complaining though. Heh.

The Nice One aka only friend: The only one who talks to me. Haha, friends ma. Then there's the other girl who just started asking me questions. Yay. New friend I hope.


The Randoms: Just randoms. Don't know who lo.


Till again.

Guys Cry.


Guys cry, both inside and outside,
Oh sure, its something we all want to hide.
Guys cry, we hurt too when we fall,
But you see, we can't always be the one who stands tall.
Guys cry, when we miss our friends,
Especially when its hard to get round the bend.
Guys cry, its only human.
Guys cry.


I'm so freaking tired this whole week. Its a JC life thing, and its killing me. One motivational factor that's keeping me going on would be that its only for this year, and I'll be free of studying after that, at least for a while. While that's that, I just hope all's well end's well, and a really grateful thanks to all those who said you liked my poem. Really, its nothing. I've seen better, but I shall be humble and accept compliments anyway. =)


But I guess poems just come on the spur of the moment.


Still, at times I realise I'm being too judgemental about people. Dawn told me that I'm usually the one who starts disliking a person. Well, you can't really blame me for that, but its something that set me off thinking.


Is my personality a thing to be changed/improved on, or shall I keep it that way? Since that personality profiling rubbish which I spend $40 bucks from edusave on, I wondered if any of it it really applicable. Can ask from me if you want a peek into it. Well, somehow or another I've fallen into the belief that I'm not the nice guy I used to think I am. So as to better myself, I wonder on the ways of self improvment, i.e. be nicer, smile more and be a total fake-o.

Like right.


So my conclusion is I'll work on the points like easily distracted and sorts, and remain the Rixen that I am. For now, but who knows, I'm already a fake-o to some. Tsk tsk.


A rumour I've heard, O level results coming out on the 25th of Feb. Panic. Scream. Do whatever you want now sec 4s.. before your results arrive. Try to burn them if you think you didn't do well.


Till again.

What Happened to Our Friendship?


What happened to our friendship, what happened to it now?
It used to be so fine, and yet now it seems to bring frowns.
Could it be the stress, could it be because of the flower,
But all I wish, is that this is all just a passing shower.

What happened to our friendship, what had happened to it?
Day by day we drift apart, bit by bit.
Its not a reason, nor I had one to start with,
Yet I feel that I'm the one who's wrong, the one who should leave.

What happened to our friendship, what happened to them all?
The jokes the laugther the tickles, all which made me fall.
What happened to our friendship, what happened to this one so true,
Now its just seems all a dream, one which I fell through.

I'm sorry for what I've done, even though I'm not sure what,
But all I've said, written and typed, is truly from my heart.
To you my dear friend, I hope we'll mend,
To be the friend I once had, and would have, forever till the end.


My first ever poem, online, originally written, and it just came so quickly.


Till again.

Found this while looking up for human rights in Singapore..


Ticklish meanings
The Washington Post published a contest for readers in which they were asked to supply alternate meanings for various words.
The following were some of the winning entries:


Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent
Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.
Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavoured mouthwash.
Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.
Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
Semantics (n.), pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood, including such things as gluing the pages of the priest's prayer book together just before vespers.
Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanour assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.
Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.
Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.
Frisbatarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.



Olympics catch phrases NBC sports commentators in action at Athens 2004:

Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."

Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."

Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious."

Softball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."

Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."

At the rowing medal ceremony: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew."

Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."

Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them...Oh my God, what have I just said?"

Credits to littlespeck.com


Haha.

Till again.

I hope I'm not wrong.


Till again.

Things to boost your moral/ego/mood. i.e. to keep you from suicide.

1. There are at least two people in this worldthat you would die for.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you insome way.

3. The main reason anyone would ever hateyou isbecause they want to be just like you.

4. A smile from you can bring happiness toanyone, even if they don't like you.

5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about youbefore they go to sleep.

6. You mean the world to someone.

7. You are special and unique.

8. Someone that you don't even know exists,loves you.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever,something good comes from it.

10. When you think the world has turned itsback on you, take a look.

11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.


After reading that above, the first thing that came to my mind was "Ya right, as if!". You can't really blame me for my cynical-manner. School hasn't been the most pleasant experience, but I wouldn't complain that its the worst either. Sure, its fun while it lasted, but seeing the results after the amount of work I put in, I guess I'm not genius in any ways.


So these days, JC1s are flooding the whole school, and the school is literally overflowing. Bursting on its reams, students are practically seen being popped out of the canteen. And the students being us.


Bloody hell, that's the only phrase I can think of now. Lard, if you see the amount of people in the canteen on wednesday at 9.30 to 10, and together with the flimsy chinese new year decorations, you would have thought you had stumbled into Chinatown. Its THAT crowded. The poor hungry JC2s who had a hard day of work even though its just the second third period of the day, are dying for a decent recess break and rest, but the horrors that greet them!!


JC1s studying at the tables and taking up space!!


JC1s playing cards and taking up space!!!


JC1s doing nothing at the tables and taking up space!!


I not being mean, in case any of you had read Joel's blog, but hell! What are they studying for? Yes, I said that they shouldn't play their first three months away, but to this extent??? Freak-ed out. Oh ya, studying the right places please, i.e. study area, or library.


And the playing cards thing, yeah, do that somewhere else, like in the Principal's office. Lard.


OH well, that being that, I guess I'm still in a slightly depressed mood, till I'm over and done with all that, I guess I'll be happier off sleeping.


Till again.

Everyone speaks.


They say things they never meant to, they say about things they never thought they would. they say things they wished they hadn't, they say things to spite others.


There are times when words simply fail people. Imagine this, unable to express the most simple thing through mankind's most common form of communication next to actions, one is just simply lost and left to the nothingness inside.


Disappointment takes place in different forms, but the feeling of something eating up inside really really sucks. Its once again, beyond words to describe. The disappointment of an appointment cancelled, the disappointment of an anticipation gone wrong, the disappointment of defeat. In one or another way, everyone of us has taken the brunt of such. No matter how much we want or not, it comes in someway or another, it strikes. theru the form of friends, the form of family, the form of loved ones, the form of aspirations.


At times when people speak, others don't listen. People ignore, people brush each other off. Well, when ignorance is bliss, as Joel put it, ignore it now, suffer later, or something along that lines. I wonder how people who don't speak deal with problems inside. Do they get so jaded and numbed by the pain, or do they just let them pass by some amazing ways we have yet to discover?


In my msn nick I placed this :

Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most


And Ruiqi the slow told me that she agreed with it. Despite the slow part, I wondered again, for the second time tonight, why did that phrase came from (the nick), and why is it true.


Well, some how, to me things are never the end. The only time when everything ends, is at death. No I'm not being morbid, but I'm just implying even time never waits, there's always time for trying again. There's always time to say Im'm sorry, there's always time to patch up old wounds, there's always time to regret, there's always time to meet up with old friends, there's always time to do whatever you want. The key is to find it, and its definitely within grip. The time to relax, is when you don't have time for it.


But for some, time passes like its nobody's business. Technically, its everybody's business, and yet no one can do anything about time, except use it, or waste it. People think we can capture time thru sands in time glasses, thru mechanism in watches and clocks, thru stopwatches and other gizmos or what nots. But time isn't measured, nor is it felt. Time can crumble mountains, time can turn young to old. But time can also turn me into a nutcase. That's besides the point now. We don't kill time, time kills us. Somehow, at this moment, I suddenly thought of this, life is a very slow suicide. Now that's morbid.


You know, if I was to worship a God, I would worship time. He's darn scary I tell you.


I'm amazed at religions. How the faith in it can really motivate people so much. But some people use religion as reasons for anything, it kind of makes me skeptical.


At 12.53 am now, I'm feeling real giddy. Time to sleep.


"My friends make me smile
Its only for awhile
but You could make me whole again"

-Atomic Kitten- Whole Again.


I want time to not do anything. I want time out. I want it now. And I know more than I look.


Make me whole again. Fill the emptiness within.


Till again.

After being chewed on by mosquitoes and itching all over like a flea bitten rabies infected monkey, I'm in a very very very bad mood now.


Its not that I'm very tired, its not that I'm very stressed.


I'm just irked by things around me again.


The table, the ribbions, the hair, the calculator, the reciept. I'm just not very happy. A good reason might be I'm not sleeping very well these days. No credits to the flimsy mattress I'm sleeping on the floor now.


Sometimes I feel like a replacement, a subsitute. Just someone to be there when others are not around. Someone to fill an empty chair, someone to be rant at.


I know I'm not anything special, anything gorgeous, anything out of the world. Face it, I'm one of the last guys on earth that anyone, not only girls, guys included, would give a second look. I'm not one who leaves a deep impression on people, nor am I one who is brilliantly humorous.


Sad to say, at times I feel that I want to be someone I'm not.


At times, I crave attention. I want love, I need company. I hate being ignored, I hate being alone. I just wished I wasn't so me at times, just be selfish and not empathy-guy. I'm being very low self-esteemed at the moment, but then again, I've never been really proud of myself. To tell myself there's more to life than the glamour and the glitz, is to like telling myself I don't need water to survive. With so many people around me being the popular, the well-known, the clever, the sporty, the funny, the good-looking, the entertaining, the rich, the everything I'm not, its not a wonder how I feel so little in a world itself so minute. And I'm only in JC. Shudders to think what if I'm out there.


Work's beginning to swarm like a bunch of crazed donkeys all over students. My condolences to all the OGLs, its alot they have to catch up. Maybe its a blessing for my operation. At least now I can do econs not as bad as before, but once again, its just the beginning.


I hope its not the beginning of The End, but rather, of the end.


Its a self-obsessed post there, loads of "I"s. Maybe its time I paid more attention to myself than the others?


Naw.


I need someone stupid to let me release my temper.


Till again.

Top Ten Events for 2005


1) CNY
Angbaos, food, compnay. 'nuff said!

2) Opening ceremony
"Born of a vision to be the best.."

3) Block test
Blockheads gonna kill us... study study and become nerds.. Joy.

4) SYF 2005
Make it or break it.

5) June hols
Chill out abit. Then mug again.

6) Prelims
Cannot play play hor.

7) A levels
Till death do us part, dear MOE.

8) Post A lvl's celebration
Whoop. Shouldn't count my eggs too early.

9) Christmas
Silent night again?

10) Get over year 2005.
It is the end of the year, good or bad.


So I've listen the top ten big things for this year I want to do, or that will happen. There's little minute details in between that's too explicit to be written down here.

Really, I hate being alone. It makes the silence so loud that it deafens. Its make the crowd so cold that its chills to the bone. Its makes the simple things so complicated that it tears inside. Its makes me so angsty I want to slap myself.


Still, the world revolves on slowly, whether I want it or not. The people still remain as they are whether I like it or not. I still remain as self centered and as low self esteemed whether I want to it or not. Poke me in the eye please. It may just wake me up. Ow~


Seriously, JC's making my posts real boring.


Poke me in the eye again.


Till again.

I hate growing up.


A new year has obivously passed, and into a not so expected year has entered into all our lives.


I hate growing up. There's so much not real anymore. Growing up makes all the exciting fantasies gone. It makes Mickey Mouse just a picture moving, just a suit with a man moving inside. It makes McDonald's just another idiot with make up and out to cheat kids their money out of Happy Meals.


I hate growing up. There's so much involving money now. I'm so much more money conscious. But then again I've always been. What makes this different, is that I've so much other wants now. i.e. a new bag of sort, new games or something interesting. But the pocket's always burning, budget on a new low, ah crap. I can't wait to earn my own money, so that I don't have to depend on my dad. Its not very nice.


I hate growing up. There's so much politics in daily life itself, it makes me feel like I'm constantly in the courtroom, doing judgements, being accused, and defending myself. The way in daily happenings hasn't been easy, and it's not about toget any easier.


I hate growing up. There's so much to know, so much we have to know, so much that we must pretend that we don't, and so much that we still don't know. Blegh. What integration, what laws of what demand, what movement of what soils. Why can't they teach us somethings like we relly need to know? Like how we should get around in life, how people tick, how girls think, how guys think, how I can get a Xbox without forking out $349??


I hate growing up. There's so much I can't do. Responsibilties, moralities, and whatever crapt tities. Duty bounded, I need to study. Like everyday after school till 7 plus. I hope this helps my grades.


I hate growing up.


Till again.